Each of us has a completely unique program structured for our spiritual development

"Think of the privilege:- you, and anyonelse who wishes, have a completely unique program structured for your spiritual development. Why look around and envy those who have secure places in the world? Don’t you think you have one? Of course you do! But its your privilege to make it rather than to fall into it. Press on for the crown, don’t dawdle and moan.
"Go! Go! Go! Commit your energies, make them flow. When we say Go for Go(l)d we mean Go for that glorious golden sunshine of our heavenly parent‘s love which showers down upon us when we're dancing along our true path secure in the spotlight of Hir /our expanding consciousness. Run if you feel confident enough – or walk with vigour and bring it to pass."


A step at a time

"Allow what's behind you to be behind you. When you were trapt you were naturally attracted to subjects that reflected that. Now you’re free, you must set them aside, or you will allow yourself to be trapt once more. Lift your energies to honour the power that set you free. Enjoy the peace of heaven.
"You trust me? Then allow my timing to govern the right conjunction of events. Just do as I say. A step at a time."


Don't lament what you can't do - honour what you've done

"Don't worry how long it takes or how tortuous the road. It's following to the end which gains the prize. The greater your natural depth the longer it may take to find it.
"Trust that you are on the only path that can lead you there. You must allow other people to participate in your process just as the Divine Source allows you to participate in hirs. Otherwise how are others themselves to receive the kind of acknowledgement which you crave for yourself?

"Now is your greatest battle. Fight it with vigour. Fight to win!
"Remember what I said when we started? A step at a time.
"Concentrate on laying this brick perfectly in your wall. Leave the design to us.

"Do you suspect it looks wayward and absurd? What must Antonio Gaudi's workmen have thought? Do as you're bidden and the next step will appear. It will be one of glorious enlargement. You've served faithfully; prepare to accept your desserts.

"But don't imagine the testing is behind you. This has just been the kindergarten slopes. When you're on the mountain alone in a blizzard – that's when you'll know what testing is! You can go as high and as far and as fast as you wish. Your subconscious controls your destiny. Please don't, however, for your own sake, let it place your rewards out of reach!
You deserve encouragement at each stage. Don't stint yourself.

"So be at peace; but be vigilant, you have a great treasure to guard;
sleep or lack of consciousness will rob you of it.

Let everything be done in an orderly and appropriate manner ...

Neither fast nor slow,
Not up, not down,
Neither high nor low,
Without smile or frown.
Not alone nor in a crowd,
Of use to all but used by none,
Neither silently nor yet aloud,
Balanced between infinity and one.

Don't lament what you can't do - honour what you've done."


Grow your branches as you grow your roots

"The strength of your own ideas can unsettle you and their energy may make you fly off into a personal space where those on the ground can’t follow you. That’s why you have to be earthed in a circle. Earthing is where you feed out the sky energies to those on earth. It serves to nourish the world and to keep you real. You were given this path, & at last you’ve chosen to follow it wholeheartedly, because it's what you need to grow: so grow, upwards and downwards!"


Struggling is not your true nature

"You can’t become peace-full by removing external pressure, you can only be at peace if you have allowed it to fill you full of your true nature. If you’re still struggling you’re not living in your true nature.
"If you fear, what do you fear?
– Is it God or people?
– – If God, then approach the source of your fear and ask for its meaning to be shown you.
– – – If it’s other people or a situation, then seek to rediscover your relationship with the source, and examine what function those fears have in relation to it.
"You can either live on the level of reality or of illusion. If you’re fearful then you’ve not yet fully moved into reality. Use this affirmation:
I am abundant with life,
abundant with light,
abundant with spiritual health.
I call these qualities into my life
and ask that they may manifest all my/our practical needs."

18/12/05. It has taken me the intervening 15 years of working with this affirmation to begin to feel its truth. This week/end has been the first time I think I have managed to stay centred & successfully invoke my angels to resolve a financial crisis, & it feels quite wonderful. Mind you they've a bit more work left to do over Xmas!


Globe of Light - the evolution of spiritual consciousness

"Let us look at the history of higher awareness in the world.
"Imagine all is darkness, so that you’re not aware whether you’re looking at a void or at an object, and if so what shape that object might be; or indeed in which direction you should be looking at all? As your unseeing gaze wanders anxiously across the ├Žons of darkness, your attention is held by a few tiny pinpricks of developed consciousness glowing dimly in a fairly localised area. This defines your direction and you stare intently. The pinpricks begin to move, almost imperceptibly, in a fascinating adagio of interaction.
"At a certain point, for reasons you can’t immediately determine, this triggers a growing brightness, and one of the points becomes an obvious focus. You, with the eye of history, see only the light. You don’t ‘see’ the darkness, and yet there is actually so much darkness surrounding you that proportionately the light is infinitesimal. Nor can you tell the scale of what you’re looking at: is it far distant and immense, or close up but minuscule? Over the millennia the lights slowly fan out, and as they spread they change colour. You’re fascinated to know why – and after much reflection you realise they’re evolving in part as a response to natural conditions and partly as a result of the inner dynamic of the light itself.
"At length you become aware that the object on which the light occurs is a globe. You move around it and you see that it has begun to define itself in terms of the solid land rather than the fluid surface. You observe that there are certain areas in which the lights glow more brightly than elsewhere, and that each has a very special quality. But you still see nothing of, or in, the darkness except where the light illuminates it. Eventually a period arrives when there are several quite separate light– explosions in different parts of the globe, each of which imparts a predominant colour to all the lights in the surrounding area. You begin to see clearly what the nature of the darkness is.
"Then, in one particularly active zone there is an explosion so bright that for a brief moment it illuminates a universe more immense than you could have ever supposed. In that revelation you see not just what is there but also forwards and backwards to other dimensions and times too. The pace of development now increases. The exploded light disseminates itself with enormous energy. Yet a curious thing happens. Often that energy moves into another dimension and assumes a latency which appears like darkness. You only know it's there because you’ve learnt to recognise the quality of Light, even when it isn’t alight. From the way the lights shudder and twinkle you know that they’re organically affected by the darkness. Yet they pulse in long cycles, lighter, darker, lighter, suddenly dark, suddenly light.
"And so you become aware that the now enormous energy of 'not-light' is re-forming even the light itself as it struggles to emerge from the dimension in which it’s evolved. The turmoil of the globe is clearly visible as all the lights develop visible links. Now for the first time you realise how little light there has always been in relation to the darkness, and you wonder at the miracle by which it has survived at all.
"As the luminescence grows you realise that darkness is simply irrelevant. It exists only to define what light is. You find it dazzling – blinding yet exhilarating; and realise that had this amount of light been thrown at you early on you couldnt’ve survived. Yet now here you are: you’re in the light, you seem to know everything, to have everything you need, to be warmed, fed, loved. In short you have become all those qualities which previously you had projected onto an external being you called God. Now you know you are them. And you’re ready to carry the dynamic of unification forward on a new set of dimensions whose very existence you couldnt’ve imagined before the illumination had revealed them to you."


Accept that you’re a cherished plant of rare beauty

"You are the way you are for a reason. You’ve evolved to this point because it was how it has been necessary for you to grow. The question is whether you’re willing to release it?
"Don’t hold onto anything. You may have to release even the spiritual practice you live by in order to move into the next stage. It’s hard, when you’ve felt so certain, to face becoming uncertain again, but that may be the price of your enlargement. Please don’t suppose you should be giving anything up. Just be alert and free to respond.
"As you grew in your first school you felt increasingly secure in your position: you knew your world and, for better or worse, it knew you. In your final term you were at last top dog: there was noone left to throw you off balance. Then all of a sudden you outgrew that environment and were picked up and thrown into a completely new one – at the bottom of the heap all over again. It wasn’t your ‘fault’. There was nothing ‘wrong’. It was just part of the growth process.
Think in spiritual terms: do you want to remain top of the kindergarten for 30 years? Maybe you’ve finished a period in a tough school and are due for the freedom of a spiritual university? Maybe your education has become too idyllic to be stimulating, and your guides are offering you something ‘livelier’? Whatever may be the case, don’t measure yourself against anyonelse: they’ve evolved their way because that's what they needed – you’ve evolved your way because that’s what you needed. That’s your special beauty, accept it.
"What use would it be for a climbing rose to wish to be a self–supporting standard rose? Accept that you’re a cherished plant of rare beauty which requires special conditions wherein to grow – and you’ve got them, like it or not! (If you were a weed you could’ve grown anywhere and nobody would’ve cared!) So accept the natural pace of your growth and respond appropriately to the conditions in which you find yourself."


You can have any reality you’ve the faith for

"Open your third eye, what do you see?"
A sunlit haze.
"You’re trying too hard. Accept that you are perfect instead of striving to be! Go inside again."
Cows in a succulent meadow, the verdant hedgerow.
"That’s better. Don’t keep measuring yourself against some impossibly high standard. Accept your current stage of spiritual evolution and just be what you are. That will be much more rewarding and attractive than striving miserably for what you were never destined to be.
Don’t let your energy be trapt on the earth-plane just because you’re afraid to dispense with the so-called 'real' world. You can have any reality you’ve the faith for. Of course there may be karma you have to work throu, & your impediments are there to feed you the necessary energy to overcome them. The greater the stumbling–block, the greater the praise /honouring it requires to shift it. That’s the reason to love your enemies. The only threat they pose is to your complacent expectations. Be grateful when they shake you up, and even as they seek to batter you soar over their heads on the energy of praise."


The dimension of unconscious knowing

"Don’t expect to be understood by those who aren’t actively following a spiritual path.
"Most people are struggling so hard to make sense of the world they can see that they have no resources with which to comprehend a world they can’t see. Of course, if they could comprehend it, they’d be able to make sense of the physical world!
"Next comes a spiritual training program for which you’ll need all your wits, so get in good shape to keep vigilant. I AM with you. Review past messages as often as possible. It’ll strengthen you. Your wings aren’t yet formed. How can they be when your spiritual body is still so new? As its strength grows so the muscles develop to allow flight.
"Stop complicating your music.* Don’t strive to notate. Allow your inner stillness to transmit itself directly onto the paper. Ask and you shall receive. Go on, ask! Then wait for it to be given you, don’t ‘take’ it in advance by spending your own money. Allow the timing to come from above. Keep on the spiritual alert. (Be unceasingly vigilant) I AM.
"You already have the ability to listen, so listen!"

* It's interesting to reread this 15 years later. After 8 years of going throu some pretty dark places where nobody wanted to know about my music at all, I reached a point where the music began to appear to me in dream. From that point on I had no doubt about the quality of my inner (musical) voice, & its connexion with the 'dimension of unconscious knowing' of which this blog is a record.