Leave space for dreaming

"Learn to say no - to yourself quite as much as to others. Dreamtime is essential for all humans: it is the appointed period for recharging the psychic batteries. If you allow it to be crowded out you become a mere battery case with no power left inside.
"Your fellow humans require many things of you, but all I require is for you to be in tune with your Self, for the true self is attached by a silver filament or a micro-link to all that is real. Then like a mariner with satellite navigation you can lock onto extra-terrestrial guidance and so pursue your voyage with absolute confidence whatever the conditions you encounter. Make space to dream. Don’t let anything or body steal it or short-change you."


What are you afraid of?

"Yes, letting go empowers. Yes, yes; say yes."


The chosen are tested in the furnace of humiliation

"You must go throu your fears to uncover your true nature. Fears are connected with lack and self-limitation. Trust your guides to gently peel away whatever is to go. In your case many fears about want/survival encompass your ability to create – well, these have to go. You must accept the initiatory night if you are ever to see the fullness of your true dawn. Go to the limit - you will find it isn’t the limit.
"Accept death, and accept dying in all its forms as nothing more than transformation – as part of life itself, as release. Do not fear to die to whatever you are now. Every organism requires certain structures in its early stages which it can dispense with later on. What feels like death is your limitations eroding to allow the larger picture to emerge.
Trust it. Trust your guides. Trust your own heart, which has brought you this far without deception. Trust me, the force who draws you onward into the power of dawn.
The more you trust, the more you are: the more you are, the more you trust.
"God has no needs because s/he is total trusting. S/he is the only personality who makes no demands whatever of you, that is why so many find hir so hard to comprehend, hir touch is as the wind caressing your shoulder: you look round expecting to see someone, you see nothing: for there is noone, there is only everything, and it is only in comprehending (trusting) the totality of experience that you can begin sense the creator-spirit.
"If you ask how one awareness comprehends all, the answer is twofold: on the level of physical manifestation (the exoteric) that one awareness is all, or, all is one awareness. On the metaphysical plane (the esoteric) there is no division of separate personalities into separated personalities. It is like the closest and deepest family where all are in instinctive commun(icat)ion. The only law is love, and this love irradiates the universe(s).
"You can find and experience all this for yourself if you trust and love your own stillness enough to feel the infinitely powerless -yet all-achieving- solar wind of love passing throu you. When you can, you have hold of the immortal part of you, your very Self; but you can no more hold onto it than you can hold onto love; if you clutch it will evaporate within your hand.
"When love has shown hirself to you like this, you must follow, as surely as the pilgrim must follow the call of the road, or the wild animal hir senses. To do otherwise is death - in this sense deathis turning back, stagnating, not changing, and ultimately decaying. Even this has a place of course, but if your calling is to re-fine /redefine yourself in order pass behind the mesh of appearances to the freedom of the ever-expanding universe within, you will miss your fullest self-actualisation if you cannot let go and simply trust love hirself.
"It isn’t hard. Really! You are only being asked to be as wonderful as you know yourself to be, and you are being assured of acceptance so you don’t need to pose! Be, and know that I, your teacher and guide, will never allow you to come to harm if you trust. (If you don’t I cannot be answerable for the consequences. Trust, my dear one.)

"I have not given you my name because some of you know me by one name and some by another. All of us who serve the light at an esoteric level are like jewels, we reflect different intensities of light and balances of colour in order to help those whose nature most attracts them to respond to that particular energy-level, but it is the same light entering all. You too can be a light-transmitter, rather than a light-absorber, if you will allow the process of purification to work in your life, clearing away the dross, scrubbing clean the windows of your soul, spring-cleaning the dark and dirty corners of accumulated garbage.
"When you are in tune, in love, en-lightened, your whole being resonates with health and you attract good to yourself just as surely as the opposite state attracts the opposite fate.
Be, my darling, my love. Be, don’t apologise, be your true self."

> This came just after the bombshell had burst when my magazine had collapsed & only disgrace & disaster appeared to lie ahead.


Trust only 'that of God within you'

"Nothing is ever what it appears on the surface. Do not trust in anything except that of God within you."

> This was given to me at a time of extreme crisis in which everything I thought I was building in /throu the divine force was being stript away. And it's the truth – alarming as that can be.


Even the dark way leads to the light

"What do you expect? Miracles? Yes, you should expect miracles; but for miracles to happen you need to stay free. Miracles happen when you have a need and are in line with your energy.
"Do not limit me by your expectations. Fire purifies. I require of all who follow me the test of fire. The 2 may come together in some great crisis.
"Welcome adversity. Give praise for setbacks. They are to prove you not to reprove you.
"Well? Maybe you do have to walk the dark way? Are you willing to trust even that? 'Darkness and light alike are mine.’
"If you have done everything required of you what have you to reproach yourself with?"

> Later in this day in 1993 a bombshell exploded in my life. My magazine had been publishing an advertising supplement for a healing exhibition. The printer which the exhibition co had insisted on turned round & demanded £1000 above the contracted price. While we were negotiating the exhibition co went behind my back & printed the programme w/t the advertising - leaving me in the lurch. Coupled with that my advertising manager suddenly disappeared. I was thus absolutely hog-tied.


The training program

"Part of the strength of a soldier or a sports person is hir self-belief. It creates a psychic force-field around them. The integration of their personality and body is supremely focused in combat-readiness. In order to reach that position they had to undergo long, hard and painful training. So do you.
"When a human coach orders a trainee to do something s/he expects to be obeyed: if the trainee fails the result will have implications for the relationship. If you believe that those spiritual realities you have experienced are trustworthy submit yourself to them just as you would to a human coach. You don’t need to worry about being required to undertake any exotic tasks – all the early lessons are about listening and responding. Only when you are completely secure and obedient will you be sent any of the harder lessons.
"The divine force does not require your help: but if you prove your determination to at-one with it you will be led on a training program to make you into a spiritual warrior sustained in your intunity on a personal wavelength by a c(h)ord of divine harmony. Inner strength only comes from battle-toughness. Don’t shirk conflict. Look for the hottest battle-scene you have the faith for and stand firm regardless of what is thrown at you. Try not to duck out, but if you have to, don’t regard it as failure. The object is not a hard surface but a tough and flexible core."

> This came one day before an event that just about anyone would have regarded as a disaster. I certainly did! Looking back on it with hindsight I now see how by breaking things out of my hands the divine force was offering me the most effective kind of transformation.


As below, so above

"In a train journey you wouldn’t expect to travel for days on end entirely in brilliant sunshine beside a beautiful river. No, to get to your destination you must sometimes pass throu tunnels to reach different valleys – nor is the weather under your control. The vehicle you travel in is not immune to defects, and there are minor matters like uncertainties with making connections!
"In the outer life, your consciousness sets your goals and integrates matters to ensure their realisation. In the inner life your sub-conscious or super-conscious (they are effectively the same) sets your goals and integrates matters to ensure their realisation. Accept that if you are clear about your goal the path that unfolds is the one that leads there. Don’t worry too much about the route it takes, there are all sorts of considerations which may be invisible from the ground, but which your guide/s can see clearly."


A new cycle

"The start of a new cycle. Time to cleanse yourself of the past and be open to the future. Be in your power (Qi), and let your power be love."

> I hope that this message is relevant for you, today, as you encounter it.
> From my perspective, uploading this13 years later, I know now that it came at a specific time when matters were heading towards a dénouement in my magazine, CataList. The magazine itself was not breaking even so I had looked around for ancillary activities we could bolt on - and had undertaken to sell advertising for a health exhibition catalog. This required more staff but at first appeared a succesful and profitable in that it increased our turnover & thus eased our cashflow. What hapened occured later can be read in the entry dated 18/6/93